How To Practise Self-Care When You Have a Lively Toddler

The dreaded time has come! I never thought it would be over this quickly and who knows how I will cope but…my boy has decided to drop his one and only nap!!! HELP!

To be fair, we are only on day 2 of this and so far so good. It’s helping him fall asleep at 7:20 p.m. instead of 10p.m. as it has been recently, he’s still majorly happy all day and not tired or grumpy. I have kept offering a nap but he’s just not interested. It also takes the pressure off me a little bit as I always worry that I need to be back for his nap and how to organise the morning and what time I can meet people etc etc, so it may have its benefits.

However, there is then the lack of rest that I will be getting. Normally, he sleeps for 2 hours in the afternoon, which is a good chunk of time for me to rest, sleep if I need it, get my hot water bottle on, write some blog posts, social, comment and find other blogs and the list goes on. I feel like at the moment I don’t get enough time to do all the things I want to do and my list keeps getting longer and longer but I guess that comes with the territory of motherhood.

Now I’m not getting that rest break though, I need to start thinking strategically how I can carve more time into the day to do the things I love and fill up my own cup.

Shower

This morning, I realised I hadn’t had a bath or shower for going on 3 days. Now, I know what your thinking ‘eww that’s disgusting’ but trust me it is not out of choice. Normally, my husband and I take it in turns to go in the bath with my boy, but for the past few days I have asked him to go in as I have just been too tired, in pain or tapped out. That 15 minute break has been invaluable to me, whilst he’s in the bath. When he’s gone to sleep I just don’t feel like going up and having a bath as I just absolutely love writing my blog and I need to spend time with my husband, too. Obviously for these 3 days, dry shampoo has been my best friend.

This morning, however, I knew the time had come to jump in that shower. So, with my boy happily playing in his bedroom and on the landing (with the safety gate closed of course), I quickly jumped in the shower where I could see him. My boy was very surprised and said ‘out’ a few times ,which was hilarious, but I just explained to him I wanted to wash mummy’s hair and he went back to playing. I felt like a new women and actually had the time to blow dry my hair too whilst he played with his toys. Bonus!

Reading

There is nothing like a good book to transport you to another world! I adore reading and always have done. My new book arrived yesterday, which I’ll be talking about in a future post, and I was desperate to read it today. (For book recommendations do refer to the post You are more than your illness: A monthly round up of the best books, TV shows, films and podcasts I have discovered.)

Today, I carved out two specific moments where I got to read my book. I chose the times when I was sat with a cup of tea. I have managed to make my boy realise that when mummy has a cup of tea she needs to drink it all before he can have his milk from mamma. That gives me at least 5 minutes maybe more to enjoy my cup of tea peacefully, snuggled up with a good book on the sofa. My boy chose this time to put a DVD on and relax, too. Remember, it’s okay for your child to watch TV. Don’t be afraid to use it.

Screen time and other acts of self care

As it’s only been two days, these are the main acts of self care I have managed to do whilst my boy is playing. I now need to figure out how to get some hot water bottle time in, some blogging time and some podcast time.

I do know that one of the main things I do need to look into is my screen time. From 24th July to 30 July, I have a daily average screen time of 3 hours and 41 minutes, which is time that could be used a lot better than this. Often, it’s just mindless scrolling on Facebook, which to be honest sometimes we need a break from.

As he is going to bed by 7:30p.m. at the latest now I also have a good chunk of time to do what I want to do balanced with time with my husband. I have also bought a new notebook to keep track of all things blog related and a to do list pad, so I can stay organised and continue doing the things I love.

Pacing

I would hate anyone to sit there thinking ‘well she’s obviously neglected her child today in order to fit those things in’ but that’s far, far, far from the truth.

We’ve been to a baby group today, a role play centre, Mcdonalds, Tesco and some charity shops today so believe me when I say my biggest focus has been on him. But, as we know, we also have to take care of ourselves and we shouldn’t feel guilty for carving sometime for ourselves into a day. I do need to work on pacing now though as there is a tendency for me to do more now with him that he’s not napping in the day. Pacing is hard but it is a skill I have to learn.

Mummy the Fibro Warrior Top Tip:

1. Use your time wisely and to your advantage so your needs are taken care of, as well. Find time for a relaxing cup of tea, a few pages of a good book, try to step away from those phones and see the ways you could be helping yourself to be the best Mummy the Fibro Warrior you can be!

If there is one takeaway I need you all to remember today is that before you were a parent, you were a person, too. You had your own interest, hobbies, needs and wants. These shouldn’t be put on the backburner, just because you are a parent now. You are doing the best you can, your child/children love you just as you are and you are Mummy the Fibro Warrior. Until next time,

x.

P.s. How do you carve time into your day to do the things you love? What pacing strategies do you use that you could share with me? Please do comment below!